Chapter One

 

I grew up in a pretty normal neighborhood and went to the same kind of public schools as everyone else. Once I got old enough I started to consume the same messages, the same media, from the same magazines and websites as every other girl. They told me that my value was based on how pretty, how sexy I was. And they gave me lavish advice on how to be sexier and prettier.

They told me I needed to learn how to use makeup and to style my hair, how to pose and dress to flaunt myself in the most attractive ways. Within the confines of what society said I could do, of course. It was often a weird balancing act to learn how to obey those messages about being a sexy girl, and yet not fall afoul of that narrow, almost invisible line between looking 'hot' and 'trying too hard'.

I mean, you don't want to get a reputation as a slut, which you would get if you wore clothes which were too provocative. But you also don't want to get a reputation as some kind of silly prude by covering up too much. There is a narrow space between those two that every girl is supposed to walk, and it's not always easy to see where the space is. Because it changes from girl to girl, often depending on their looks and shape.

I mostly ignored those messages. They were all about how to make yourself into a girl that boys would want to have dangling on their arms. I didn't want to dangle on the boys' arms. That didn't mean I didn't want to have sex with boys. I did. A lot! More, as far as I could determine, than any of my girlfriends.

They were all interested in how to make themselves seem sexy for guys and how to please guys, in bed or out. How to let themselves be seduced so as to pretend they were resisting a little, in order to avoid being called sluts when they gave in. Their talk was all about making boys happy. I was interested in making myself happy.

Yet none of them acted like sex was something they typically wanted, so much as something they knew was inevitable because guys wanted it. And one by one as they lost her virginity their stories were usually of embarrassment, messiness, pain, and discomfort.

This baffled me, to some extent. But I didn't know how to explore it with them without revealing my own fantasies, some of which were pretty dark and nasty because they were based on what I'd seen on the Internet.

And I'd seen a lot on the Internet!

I love looking at myself naked and taking pictures and videos of myself naked. It's like the secret me that no one else can see. It's the me that resembles all those hot, sexy girls on the internet. I can flaunt my body before the camera, or the mirror, without worrying about someone thinking I'm a slut.

I can do all kinds of nasty things to myself while my mind plays out those fantasies, and I don't have to worry about consequences or reputation. So I had a very active sex life, even if it was just with myself and a few sex toys I had bought over the internet.

I had done all the stuff to my body that I saw guys doing in those videos, and even learned to deep throat with one of my dildos. Sometimes I did it while my video camera was watching me and I was watching myself on the monitor next to it. For some reason, I thought that was a lot more exciting than just watching myself in the mirror. Maybe because it made me look like one of those internet sex stars.

I've always liked tall boots, in leather or suede. I think they're especially sexy when combined with a short skirt, though I almost never wore one. I was wearing knee-high suede boots today combined with a forest green, bohemian style dress. The dress was cute, with a loose skirt and big puffy sleeves. It had a simple open neck, which I decorated with a light green scarf.

I was a month and a half into my first real job after high school, working for Emily Rose, a management consultant who worked at a small consulting agency downtown. It was on the tenth floor of a modern office building, sectioned off with a separate entrance by the elevator, with big glass doors and brass letters on the window.

There were a dozen offices inside that area, but they were usually mostly empty. Each office belonged to one of the consultants, and they were usually working somewhere else, for some company or government agency who had hired them. Usually only one or two of them were actually in the office at any given time.

I worked behind the counter just inside the glass doors, taking messages and generally fetching and carrying whenever one of the consultants showed up and needed office supplies or something. Emily Rose was the head of the little agency, and for whatever reason, she was the one who was usually there.

I was kind of envious of her because she seemed very sophisticated, slick and successful and businesslike and professional, and educated. And she was only in her 30s! I would've liked to model myself after her as much as I could but at my age she was at university and it didn't look like that was a place I was destined to attend.

Which meant I was not going to be a management consultant. I did like her fashion style, though, and she managed that sexy/attractive look without it going anywhere near the border of being obvious or trashy. She met and dealt with important people every day, after all. She couldn't afford to look trashy.

I could tell she was not in a good mood as soon as I got in the door. And I knew that meant she was working on an important deadline and was stressed. That led to her being snappish at times, and I did my best to stay away from her, not interrupt her, and fetch whatever she needed as quickly as possible.

Her office was at the end of the hall anyway, and I was up front behind the reception desk.

Towards the end of the day, Emily started loading work onto me. I needed to print up the report that she had been writing in multiple colors, and in multiple copies. Everything had to be perfect and then had to be placed into a classy-looking folder with the firm's logo on it.

Emily never yelled at me, but I could tell when her voice got tense, and hastened to do the work as quickly and efficiently as possible. Unfortunately, I'd only been there a month and a half, I was not yet completely expert on how to work the complicated, computerized photocopy machine.

I printed up a hundred copies and they were all in black and white. Emily was not pleased. She had a lot of pretty colored charts and pictures in the reports and so it had all be redone. Which meant I had to stay after work. I didn't resent that, since it was my own fault. I was super embarrassed about the mistake.

It was a Friday, and hot and muggy out. The building turned the air conditioning way down at closing time. Emily and I were both getting pretty harried and stressed out as we struggled to finish the report. She was going on some kind of trip over the weekend and needed the reports all finished and ready to go for Monday morning.

Which meant they had to be finished tonight, or she wasn't going to be able to enjoy her weekend. As the evening wore on I learned that the trip was to a lakeside cabin, probably a fancy one, from the sound of it. She was going to be meeting her boyfriend, who from the way she talked was the hottest, sexiest, smartest guy in the world.

I was kind of surprised she was this stressed out over being late to meet some guy that evening. She'd seemed like too strong a personality to be that determined to please her man. As I prepared the reports in their folders she hurried around getting changed.

What caught my eye was the high boots. Unlike mine, hers were black leather and thigh-high, with stiletto heels. It seemed like an odd thing to wear to a lakeside cabin, but I wasn't going to say so. She had gotten less stressed and a lot more friendly as it appeared we were nearing the end of our work and it would be done on time for her to meet Nick, her boyfriend.

When I carried the latest batch of report folders into her office she came out of the attached bathroom half-naked, stunning me with what she was wearing. In addition to the boots, she had on a black G-string and a leather shelf bra which basically had no cups. It was a bra that cupped and lifted her breasts but basically only covered the bottom third. Her nipples were quite intentionally visible.

I stared at her in astonishment and felt my face redden. Emily was a very sexy woman, and I was a virgin who was getting desperate enough to start thinking about maybe experimenting with women instead of men. I had had little flights of fantasy about her before, though nothing serious. Just occasional thoughts about what it might be like with her. I'd had such thoughts with lots of guys and girls and nothing had ever happened because I was too reluctant to open myself up to anyone.

She grinned at the look on my face. "What? You've never dressed sexy for a boy?"

"Um, not like that! I mean, I don't mean like there's anything wrong with that," I quickly fumbled out.

She laughed in amusement. "Nick likes to see me dressed the opposite of the way I usually do when I'm working. He says this is my inner slut."

She turned and pulled on a black silk blouse, and buttoned it up the front. It was quite tight across the chest and her nipples were quite obvious.

"What about you, Hannah? I'm sure that you have sexy things you wear for guys."

"Well, lingerie," I said uncomfortably.

"Sexy lingerie? See-through lacy, crotchless panties?"

"Eww, no. I mean yes, some lacy stuff."

"Sex is very easy for the young," she said. "All your guys want is your basic blowjobs and intercourse. When they get older, they have more kinky interests."

I was a little embarrassed by this but also quite interested.

"Like what?" I asked.

She laughed softly. "Like what, the little girl asks."

She stood before me giving me a steely gaze then gripped my arm and firmly turned me toward the desk, pushing me a little so my thighs were against the edge. I felt her hand on the back of my neck pushing me forward enough that I put my hands on the desk to balance myself.

"So Hannah is being a bad girl, is she?" she said, feigning a masculine voice. "Well, Hannah is going to have to learn some discipline."

And with that, her hand smacked my bottom sharply enough that I yelped.

"Is Hannah going to be a good girl or is she going to need a spanking?" she said in that same voice.

Crack! Her hand slapped against my bottom again.

"Ow, Emily!" I yelped.

She laughed again and stepped back.

"I take it you've never been spanked," she asked slyly.

"God, no!"

"Don't knock it till you've tried it, kid." She winked at me and picked up a long leather skirt.

The idea of her letting herself be spanked by some guy was more than a little astonishing. Especially since she seems so strong-willed. She wasn't the least embarrassed about it, either. I was more embarrassed by her revelation than she was. But I also found myself instantly intrigued.

And this strange image of her naked across some guy's lap getting spanked on her bare bottom was kind of astonishing. And while I could see that this was kind of an erotic scene, I really didn't understand what she would get out of it.

"How can having your butt slapped be fun?" I asked.

"Well, it's part of a particular scenario which involves an awful lot more," she said.

"Like what?"

I was probably being too intrusive, but was honestly intrigued. It wasn't like I hadn't seen spanking scenes on videos on the Internet or anything. I just didn't understand how the girls would enjoy that.

"You have to establish a mindset," she said. "That mindset is what causes the excitement and pleasure. Once your mind is in that particular frame, the body will follow. Remember that the most important erogenous zone is between your ears, Hannah, not between your legs."

"I... get that," I said uncertainly.

"How many more of these to do?"

"The last ten are printing," I said.

"Okay, you have a few minutes. Let me demonstrate something for you. Take off your dress."

My face suddenly turned red and she snickered as she watched me.

"Shy?" she teased "I won't touch you at all. That's not the demonstration."

"Well, I mean...,"

"You are wearing underwear, aren't you?"

"Yes!" I said, face red.

She was giving me a kind of superior look, an amused look, as if I was acting like a silly little sophisticated girl here. What made it worse was that I thought she was probably right. But I was also feeling a strange little flutter of excitement at the thought of undressing in front of her. I mean, I had had those little thoughts about her and me before, after all. I didn't think she really meant anything, but still...

I reached down and peeled the loose hanging dress up and then over my head and off, holding it and putting it on the back of the chair, suddenly feeling extremely self-conscious as she looked me up and down.

I was wearing a small purple thong, which was really little more than a small V of fabric over my sex with two thin strings angling up across my hips and around behind me. My half bra matched with the thong.

"Why, Hannah," she said with a smile "you've been hiding your assets. You have quite the body there, little girl."

I flushed under her gaze, butterflies swirling in my stomach.

She took my arm and guided me to the corner.

"Kneel here, sit on your heels and spread your knees wide. Now put your hands behind your neck and arch her back."

I was flustered and confused, but those butterflies were swirling faster and faster as I did what she told me.

"Stay," she said in a stern voice. "If you move it all, you will be punished! You understand me, girl?"

"Y-Yes," I gulped.

She smiled down at me. "Oh no, dear. Your response is yes Mistress. Say it."

"Yes, Mistress," I said.

"Or if it was Nick it would be yes master," she said, turning away.

Wow! This was kinky shit! The thought of her doing this in front of this mysterious boyfriend of hers sent a dark thrum of excitement through my mind.

"How long do you have to kneel like this?" I asked.

She gave me a stern look. "You say how long must your slave girl kneel here, Mistress," she growled.

Oh wow! Her words sent a strange dark jolt through my mind.

"Um, how long must your slave girl kneel here, Mistress?" I asked.

"Your mistress will decide that, slave. It is not for you to ask questions. It is for you to obey orders. That is what a sex slave is for."

Wow! Yikes! Her words left me a little breathless, my chest tightening, and my nipples tingling. Did she really do stuff like this with her boyfriend?!

"Except that I would be doing that naked, of course," she said.

Another jolt swept through me at the image that presented.

She smiled. Would you like to take off your underwear to get the full emotional impact?"

"N-No, No, that's okay!" I said hurriedly.

She giggled a little, clearly amused at my embarrassment.

She finished zipping up her skirt as I knelt there, and gave me that steely-eyed look again.

"You are obeying your mistress, slut?!" She growled.

"Y-Yes! I mean, yes, Mistress!" I squeaked.

"Arch that back, slut! Push those beautiful breasts out so the world can admire them."

I felt another rush of heat at her words, and a strange pressure growing within me. But then she grinned and said I should get to my feet and go get the other ten reports. I was both relieved and disappointed as I climbed to my feet and walked over to get my dress.

"You can leave the dress off for now," she said in amusement. "After all, it's hot in here."

I hesitated uncertainly, and then, blushing, walked out into the hall in just my underwear and boots. I felt very strange up there like that. I glanced nervously up the hall towards the front, but I knew the door was locked and no one could see me back here without coming inside.

It still felt weird working the photocopy machine in my bra and thong. And Emily contributed to that sense of uncertainty and uneasiness, passing me by slapping my bare bottom.

"The work better be done right, slave girl, or it's the whip for you," she growled as she walked up the hall and into one of the other offices.

"Weird!" I whispered softly

But my pulse was racing and I was embarrassed by how hard my nipples were, afraid she might notice. I gathered up the reports and brought them into the other room with a large table where I divided them out and then began to place them in their folders.