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CHAPTER 1

One afternoon last summer, the phone rang.

"Higgins!` said a most commanding voice.

I felt a strong urge to stand to attention. `Yes sir?`

"It`s Colonel Groper-Bodley-Hedde here.`

"Good Lord,` I said. `Is it really?`

"Yes. Groper-Bodley-Hedde. GBH, most people call me. Heard of me, have you?`

Actually I hadn`t. I was just surprised by that extraordinary triple-barrelled monicker,
but I didn`t tell him that.

"Well, the name does ring a bell,` I said, because I find that flattery pays.

"Yes, course it does, course it does,` the Colonel bellowed down the phone. `Pretty
well known chap in the district, if I do say so myself. Captain of the golf club, county
councillor, all that sort of thing. Oh, and chairman of the governors of Mrs Smith`s
Academy for Young Ladies.`

Mrs Smith`s Academy. Now that I had heard of. It`s located about three miles down the
road from where I live. A lot of people make detours to drive past it, because if you keep
your eyes open you can often catch a glimpse of the young beauties going about their
business. As a result it`s a well known accident black spot.

"Chap called Crabbworthy-Evans recommended you,` Colonel GBH continued. `Member of
my club in town. Said you`d been able to help his son.`

"Ah yes,` I said, `I believe I was able to be of some assistance. And what can I do
for you, Colonel?`

"Well, that`s a bit on the confidential side,` the military man informed me. `I
think you`d better come round and see me.` So I did.

When I got to the address he`d given me, I found that the Colonel lived in a substantial
mansion at the end of a lengthy drive. Worth a few bob, I thought to myself, and mentally
added a nought to his bill.

The Colonel was disgusted when I asked for a lemonade instead of the large glass of
whisky that he offered me, and which he himself preferred. But I`m not much of a drinker
at the best of times; and especially, as I pointed out to him, when I`m on a case.

"Oh well,` he grumbled, `I s`pose there`s some sort of sense in that. Now then,
Higgins, let`s get down to business.... I told you over the phone that I`m chairman of the
governors of Mrs Smith`s Academy, and the Headmistress there, a widow woman called Mrs
Jennings, has got a bee in her bonnet about Peeping Toms. Or a Peeping Tom, to be precise.
Says she`s had several sightings these last few weeks--seen a chap wandering about in the
grounds at night.

The Colonel sank half an inch of whisky before continuing.

"Of course, I suppose it`s a bit more comfortable standing in the shrubbery on a
warm summer night than it is in the middle of winter, but I don`t think there`s anything
in it myself. I reckon the girls make these stories up, to give themselves something to
talk about. Pure female hysteria if you ask me. Still, you never know. There could be a
prowler out there somewhere, and the rest of the governors have demanded that we do
something about it. So, I`ve decided to commission you to keep watch for a few nights.
Won`t take long. All you need do is say you`ve seen nothing, which will be true, and then
we can all forget about it. You get your fee, and I get peace and quiet again. OK?`

"Sounds fine to me,` I said. And as a matter of fact it was such a simple job that I
thought it was a bit beneath me really, but I never pass up a chance to visit a young
ladies` college. So we haggled a bit about the fee--he wanted me to pay him more than I
could afford, heh heh heh--and then I drove off to see the Headmistress. Her name, as the
Colonel had mentioned, was Mrs Jennings.

The Headmistress was expecting me. The Colonel had phoned her, and so when I arrived I
was shown straight into her study.

Mrs Jennings was a surprisingly small, dark-haired woman of about forty. I realised at
once that she must have a very powerful personality to have overcome the disadvantage of
her size, but she gave no sign of being bossy or overbearing.

"What do you know about our Academy, Mr Higgins?` she began.

"Not much,` I admitted.

She nodded. `Excellent. In that case you will start with no preconceptions. Or
misconceptions. So let me explain.

"Mrs Smith`s Academy is now based in what was once Bedmore Hall, and its extensive
grounds. As our name suggests, we were founded in the late nineteenth century by a certain
Mrs Smith. From the very beginning our founder specialised in dealing with girls of
eighteen or so who were difficult, intractable, disobedient, and generally a worry to
their parents. That is still our mission.

"We have always been a private institution, and we charge high fees, so we deal
almost exclusively with girls from wealthy homes. But a wealthy home is not always a happy
home, Mr Higgins. And nearly all the girls who come to us have given their parents great
cause for concern.`